09 October 2015

Some Random Thoughts on Writing as Other Genders and Orientations in Erotica and Erom

I just saw a meme posted on Facebook that went like this:
A feminist asked me how I viewed lesbian porn. Apparently "in HD" was not the correct answer.
My books have approached the top 100 in Lesbian Erotica on Amazon. Yes I'm sitting on a big ol' pile of white male mostly straight privilege, but at the end of the day it's about empathy, research, and (hopefully) good writing. Bisexual women and lesbians are some of my biggest fans.

Women of various sexual and gender orientations/identifications love male gay porn and reading M/M erotica. Women love to write it, too. Nobody shits on them for it, at least that I know of. Are there gay men who reject the notion of women writing M/M gay erotica as inauthentic? Maybe somewhere, but I haven't seen it.

Because of our history and the way men have had control over what constitutes history, norms, laws, and policy, there's a lot more baggage involved if men are aroused by lesbian porn or reading lesbian erotica.

It's almost as bad as the misunderstandings that arise about sexual orientation and gender in relation to BDSM. All genders and orientations can be and are Dominant, submissive, enjoy bondage and/or discipline, and are sadists and/or masochists. None of these are sole domain of men or women, hetero- or homosexual.

Lebians particularly, and even women in general, want to express their own sexuality THEIR way, and not have it dictated to them by men. Like anything, being lesbian or existing at any point along the orientation spectrum is not just one thing as defined by a strident portion of the group. Men like to watch lesbians that look attractive to them. Like, fucking DUH. Does that mean lesbians won't like it? Not automatically, but there's a good chance that porn vid made by men wasn't made to appeal at all to actual lesbians. If lesbians made a porn film with femme lesbians, it probably would still appeal to men.

Because I'm privileged and have a built-in advantage, I feel I need to constantly remain aware of it and try to always remain respectful. Understanding and empathy without ego or feeling the need to defend anything goes a long way. I'm certainly not going to stop writing. I don't apologize for what I like. I write what I like.

Maybe because most of my characters are fantasy transsexual/transgendered people that do not exist in reality, it's a little different for me. I'm not going to write a lesbian romance in the way most people think of one. I like bisexual or pansexual and fantasy creatures much better. My girls have both sets of sexual organs. Easterners consider them lesbians. In Japan, where the term futanari came from, all futanari hentai is considered lesbian.

In the West, if you put a cock on something, it's automatically derided as "gay." It's as though if you have sex with a girl who has a cock, somehow you find all other masculine attributes attractive and now you're just gay but you can't admit it to yourself. That kind of "thinking" is so atrociously stupid it's horrifying.

I don't particularly like conflating futanari with transexuals or crossdressers or sissies. If she doesn't have a pussy AND a dick, then to me she's not futanari. But that's just my preference and other people see it differently.

My point is, though, that I bring everything I know and have experienced as a male and everything I know due to empathy and research about being female to bear on writing women who have both sex organs in a way that feels real, that makes you care about them, and that turns you on.

Writing straight men is the singularly most uninteresting thing to me. Gay male erotica doesn't turn me on and I have no desire to write it. I love writing women characters. They're just so much more interesting to me. Whether they're straight, lesbian, bi, transexual, or futanari. In fact I have yet to write a male POV story at all in my career as an erotica/erom author, since May of 2015 up to now, October of 2015 and having published 4 novels. Although that will change in a new series I'm planning.

Look, it's all a big fucking complicated mess. Let's all just try and be respectful, tactful, and cool with each other.

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